What I should be doing:
- Filling out my application for a work scholarship at New Dance Group
- Organizing the apartment
- Washing dishes
- Finishing alterations on co-worker's uniforms to make extra cash
- Laundry
- Inventing something completely unnecesary but totally cool that everyone will want to buy
What I am doing:
- Watching On Demand episodes of Sex and the City
WHERE'S MY MOTIVATION!!!
Am I depressed? Is this what that feels like? Or, am I just a procrastinator? I've never been this unmotivated. In fact, I've always been an overachiever, always one step ahead.
Is it this city, this life? Would I be happy living in a place where I could find a job I could stand, pay off my bills, buy a house and become a mother with a comfortable clean home? I don't know. I remember being on a similar path and I wanted more. I was driven and ended up here to 'make it'. Whatever that means. Well, success is measured in many different ways. Somehow, I don't feel that conquering NYC will be the measure of my success. There's much more planned for me.
Now, I will finish that application and do the dishes. Two out of six, not a bad start.
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